Naming Your Brokenness

On Easter Sunday, our pastor challenged us to name our brokenness. How horrible that it took me days to do that. I know I am broken, but I didn’t like naming it. I would think of something, but then think, “No, that isn’t that bad.” I would think of something else. Nah, that isn’t horrible. What a prideful heart I have. I could name my husband’s brokenness; I could name my mom’s brokenness; I could name my friend’s brokenness. Now, they are broken. But, me, well, I am just a little cracked. Again, what a prideful heart I have. That could be my brokenness, just being Angie. She is completely broken, and sadder still is the fact that I don’t notice that before I notice other’s brokenness.

I did finally name it though. I have named it Mart-Ha. That is really Martha, but just a little variation. I do not really like the Martha story in the Bible. It hits a little too close to home. Not the second (I think second) time Martha has a story (when she leaves her house to go see Jesus – and question him – when her brother, Lazarus dies). The first story of Martha is the mirror for me. Martha did all of the cooking and preparation for Jesus coming to visit. After the meal, Mary sits down to listen to Jesus, and Martha is left cleaning up….again. She tells Jesus He needs to scold her sister. Martha has been working hard, but Mary has done nothing. And now, she is just going to sit there and visit. Jesus says Mary has figured out what is important, and Martha should do the same. That is ME. That is my brokenness. I am so consumed with how other people should act; I can’t enjoy what my Savior has for me. I definitely don’t want to entertain the notion that they could be correct. So that is my ugliness, my brokenness.

That isn’t the end though. I have a Savior that comes down and meets me in my ugliness. I don’t have to “get perfect” to have a relationship with Jesus. I don’t have to DO anything; I just have to accept.

Can you name your brokenness?